I have a new most hated phrase. It is “living life on your own terms.” It’s always touted as this thing to aspire to, as though it takes some special strength or perseverance to achieve it. As though it is something to be admired. As though we should all be a little more like the person who is described as doing it.

What a crock.

Living life on your own terms isn’t a choice. It isn’t something you get if you just put in enough hard work, like a Christmas bonus. It doesn’t make you a better person. As a matter of fact, it’s an incredibly selfish thing to do, if you really think about it. It requires a level of narcissism that most people don’t possess (or at least, don’t admit to). Demanding that your life, and all of the things in it, adhere to a set of parameters that you have…